Grandma Neves and the big trek out West

The phone rang early last Wednesday morning. An early phone call, or a really late one for that matter, is never a good thing. Keith's grandma, Grandma Neves, had passed away just shortly before. His parents were calling to tell us the news.

After the phone call, Keith and I lay in bed waiting for the alarm to go off, thinking of how much we needed to be at the funeral to pay tribute to her life. What an amazing life. We didn't get to see her much since we moved to Philadelphia but were so glad we saw her one last time this summer. Bennett and Leah were able to meet their Great Grandma.



It's never easy to have a loved one die. No matter how sick and miserable they are, it still leaves an open wound full of memories that takes time to heal. In the case of Grandma Neves, she was pretty miserable. She had been sick for quite a while and Keith's mom had been caring for her nearly around the clock for months, it seemed. It was exhausting for everyone, I'm sure. Certainly no one complained about it. Well, except Grandma Neves. She was pretty sick of being sick. She was always a very independent lady. When we were there this summer, she complained that her kids kept coming around to check on her and they wouldn't leave her alone.

She passed away on her 89th birthday. I think that was the deadline she set for herself. She quit taking all her meds a couple of days before. The night before her birthday she took off her oxygen and said she didn't need it anymore. She wanted to go and she just got sick of waiting. She took death, just like she took life: on her own terms.

Grandma Neves grew up under circumstances that anyone else would have crumbled under. She lost her mother to cancer at age 7. Her stepmother beat her and regularly kicked her out of the house. As a young girl, she slept under a train bridge and would often go to school hungry and dirty after a night out in the bitter Wyoming cold. She had a horrible childhood. Yet, she was able to forgive. And made sure that no one was ever as sad as she was. She always put her family first. As well as friends, neighbors, and anyone she came in contact with. She was awarded "Citizen of the Century" in her community several years ago. What an amazing life she lived. We'll miss her.

We were so glad we were able to be there for the funeral. But talk about an epic adventure! WE DROVE! Yikes! We jumped in the car on Thursday after Keith got off work and drove through the night. We finally pulled into Wyoming on Friday night. Somehow, the kids were amazing. As amazing as a 3-year old and a 10-month old can be when they are strapped in car seats for over 30 hours straight. Actually, it was painful. But we just kept driving. At least on the way there the scenery gets better and better. The drive home through North Dakota and Missouri were pretty difficult.

Funerals are meant to be solemn affairs. Grandma Neves' funeral was....not. It turned out to be the party of the century for the citizen of the century in Burlington, WY. We probably should have booked a band for the viewing. It was a raucous reunion. Every single child and grandchild made it there--except for Keith's brother Mark in Alaska. I'd be embarrassed to show my face too if my Governor looked like Tina Fey. But whatever.... There were over 150 relatives there! What a great legacy. I was pretty sure they cancelled school in the town so that people could attend the funeral. But I did notice a few cars in the school lot as we drove past so I guess they didn't.

Regardless of the absence of a band, we did have a great time. Despite having this view for SIXTY HOURS in a short 5 days. South Dakota is relentless....


All of Keith's brothers (except Mark) got to hang around and be dorks...er, awesome dudes in matching trucker hats...together. Ahhh, good times...

Some cousin time for Bennett. He loves cousins!!


Some 4-wheelin'...



And fossil huntin'...




And a little bit of middle of nowhere trail running. This is called the String of Pearls. Its a cool knife-edge series of bumps that goes and goes. Keith decided to see how many "pearls" he could run.




We had a good time in Wyoming and were glad we were able to be there to celebrate Grandma Neves' life. We are so glad to know that she is in a better place and happy to not be sick anymore!

We are also glad that we won't be driving through South Dakota again for a while... :p